“Building a Teaching Community: A Dialogueâ€
My mind is (I originally mistyped “is†as “idâ€!) swirling
with notions of bodies and classrooms, of erasure and assertion, of power
implied and realized…and I’ve been wanting to start writing as I’ve read this dialogue
but have found the…reminder… that hooks/Scapp continue to see “university
settings as sites for the reproduction of a privileged class of values, of
elitism†(140) as a provocative (or not really provocative enough) place to
insert my voice.
It is their
emphasis on “practicing teaching†that I find refreshing and challenging (but
that also makes me skeptical) -- how we use our bodies, how we actually move
around the room, ‘embody’ the knowledge and traditions we consider as our
expertise, what we ask of students (and how we ask it of them). hooks mentions “tone of voice,†for example.
Does my tone of voice really have that much impact on how I insist that the
writers in my classes participate rather than observe and be passive (though
observation can be a part of a process of activity, right?)?
I can’t
help but hear echoes of my work with colleagues struggling to incorporate
writing assignments – how students suddenly become visible and that the
language of the class suddenly becomes much more negotiable in ways that it
wasn’t previously when students were not asked to write out their thinking
(instead, for example, only taking scantron exams). When we talk about language
we can’t not talk about race and class and even gender. What language(s) do we end up privileging? I
encounter this in my own poetry class – even this semester, seeing in myself a
preference in my commentary and grading for certain kinds of language over
others, even when students consciously locate themselves in a specific tradition
of poetry writing (and it happens to be one that I don’t necessarily value as
they do…).
[I know I’m kind of spinning out my thinking about my
specific class, but, well, I’m asking that you accept my contribution here as
including this kind of thinking – even if you don’t recognize it as relevant to
your own specific case…]
Ok, let me jump a bit to this quote: “I think our fear of
losing students’ respect has discouraged many professors from trying new
teaching practicesâ€(145). Something like this idea came up with some graduate
students I’m working with recently (with Belle) – it was fear but in terms of
trying something that might “failâ€. Our suggestion was to be upfront with the
students involved, to let them know you are trying something new and are not
sure how it will work, but to explain why you are trying it….
So let me link that idea to something that happened in my
class: throughout the semester I have told my students to push back on
assignments that I give if they just don’t work, but that in doing so they must
be willing to have thought carefully about why they are choosing an alternative
to my assignment and be willing to defend it. I had (gasp!)(the nerve!) several students actually push back, but not
on specific assignments. It was on midterm grades. I asked the class, after
handing back their midterm portfolios, how they were doing, what they were
feeling after getting their grades (they were very quiet for a while, so I rode
out their silence). Finally one student burst: she was pissed, frustrated,
wanted to know why she got the grade she did, whether anyone else received
better grades and wanted to know why.
So there I was, all eyes on me, called upon to justify to
the whole class both individual grades and the collective feeling of
frustration about their grades. Lots of nodding heads to the question, “Anyone
else feel this frustrated?†So I talked
about how I graded and why I graded. I was felt a bit defensive (do I deserve
this?! I’m a good teacher! I thought they liked me, got me.). At the same time I recognized and valued
that they were willing to take the chance, express their anger and make it a
part of our ongoing conversation.
Then I found myself conflicted, or not conflicted but pushed
to reflect in a serious way about their response (which was quite angry) and to
seriously reexamine my own grading process and how I was complicit in provoking
such emotion. It made me uncomfortable. I told them so. But I also told them
that they did exactly what they should have done- approach me, confront me in a
respectful way, address the issue and find a solution. I don’t know that what ended up happening
was my “affirm[ation of] the value of student voices†(149) – of taking
students seriously in a way that is negotiated and that attends to the many
complex and overlapping contexts we live in our classrooms. But I think it was. It felt like it to me at
the time and upon further reflection.
Pete